Get Off My Beam!

I'm one of #the4500 ladies who applied to be on Jen Hatmaker's launch team for her new book, For The Love, that releases in August, but weren't selected to be one of the 500 on the official launch team.   Jen & Thomas Nelson were generous enough to give us 4 chapters to tease us, um I mean preview before August.  Jen also shared an essay "Worst Beam Ever" about priorities and things having to get kicked off our beam in order for our lives to have balance.

In late 2013 I went back to work part time.  I tried quitting in March, 2014 but my boss, as well as my supervisor who happens to be one of my good friends, both encouraged me to cut back and stay on.  I accepted the reduced hours.  In November 2014 I realized how many things had become off balance as a result of having this on my beam.  There was one client in particular I absolutely LOVED working for, and they were the hardest to say good-bye to.

I hadn't told my husband I was considering quitting.  I just did.  One night I submitted my work for the week, submitted my letter of resignation about 5 minutes later and then went in the family room where he was watching TV and said "I just quit."  My quiet, introverted husband was ecstatic!  After I quit he admitted to me that he never really wanted me to work in the first place, but he didn't want to tell me "No" since it's something I was so excited about.

In February, 2015 I stopped being a consultant for Thirty-One gifts after nearly 6 years.   I wasn't making money because our family life was too busy to do parties and all my friends are on strict budgets.   After limping along in that business for awhile I told God "I'll stay active as long as you want me to, but I'm no longer going to force it."   For about 1.5 years I would get an order about 2 weeks before going inactive (I had to have a minimum amount of sales ever 3 months) that would keep me active for another 3 months.  Well . . . that came to an end in Feb, 2015 and I'm ok with it.

Though the beam gets wobbly at times, it's fairly balanced and I can handle things the way they are right now without too much stress.

This afternoon I had my phone on silent and when I looked at it about an hour later I saw a message from my friend and former co-worker asking if I'd be interested in working for my favorite former client as my own boss (instead of doing work for them as part of another company).  My gut reaction was to say, "Yes."  I'd love to work for them again.  They are the only people I'd consider working for.   I was tempted to say, "Yes." I wanted to say, "Yes."  Then I remembered the beam.  I remembered how my husband reacted when I told him I'd quit.  I remember the squeal my 8 year old son let out, and the way he ran across the room to choke hug my neck when I told him and my daughter that I'd quit.  I realized my beam doesn't have room for working right now.

Tonight my husband will get home from work and I'll tell him, "I was approached about going back to work today.  I said, 'No.'"

You can pre-order your own copy of For The Love at bn.com or Amazon